Even if there are storm clouds above you – there is still the possibility of sunshine. Why? Because you have choices how to experience life. These choices are not only about what you choose for the future – and that is good. Your choices are also about what has happened already or is just happening.
Even if you think that today is a lousy day, because “something bad” happened, it can still be a good day.
“You are kidding, Brigitte!” No, I am not. When you think something is bad – what makes it bad? Your thinking about it, your judgment.
Let’s say you are in downtown Boston and walk down Newbury Street (or one of the main shopping streets in your town) to have a cup of coffee in one of the coffee shops there and you meet a friend. There’s nothing bad about meeting your friend! In fact, you are happily surprised to see your friend. But as it happens, your friend does not seem pleased to see you. She looks at you distractedly, says that she is in a hurry, then walks away without a smile or a “bye bye”.
Now, many things can happen – and they are all in your mind.
You are disappointed and feel thunder clouds above your head. “What have I done wrong?” you might think, “Did I not greet her sufficiently friendly?” Or maybe you think, “Did I annoy her when last we met?”
As you think these thoughts, the thunder clouds above your head seem to get darker. Thoughts come to your mind like, “She already acted a little weird towards me last Monday”, or “Maybe I’m mistaken and she never really cared about me.”
If you go down this path of negativity, the thunder clouds become even darker. “Maybe there is no real friendship. People only care about themselves.”
However, you don’t have to think this way. You are in luck: you have choices. You can make the choice to let the sun shine on the landscape of your life.
As you deliberately reach for thoughts that feel lighter, happier, you might think, “She seemed to be stressed. Many people are. Next time we meet she will be friendly again.” Another thought may come to mind, “Sometimes I am stressed and strained myself. Who knows how I might behave in her situation.”
As you continue to let the sun shine on the landscape of your life, you might think, “She is still my friend and I care about her, regardless of how she behaved today. I will call her tomorrow and ask her if she wants to have dinner next week.”
And as your thoughts turn to peace and contentment with the world, you find that this is the perfect time to just sip your coffee and watch people, flirt with an interesting stranger, or dive into the book you brought. What a delightful afternoon!
As you choose these friendly thoughts, you feel good again. You enjoy the coffee in one of the coffee shops in Newbury Street. Life is good.
It’s good to have choices, right? You are in luck!
Brigitte Novalis, healer, therapist, and the author of “Finding Love” and “The Magic of Inner Silence”